


Love isn't enough (2012)

by MatsuFla



Series: You really think that all those who love each other are together? [1]
Category: Shameless (US), Shameless (US) RPF
Genre: 2012, All Shameless cast, Behind the Scenes, Cameron Riley Monaghan, Cast as family, Cheating, Fast Burning/Sloooooow Development, Friends to Lovers, I hate tags bc they spoil too much so I just give you these, Love triangle (and various quadrilaterals), M/M, Noel Roeim Fisher, Real Life (RPF), Real Twitter, Real news/articles/social events, Scenes from the series, Season 3, mosher, real instagram, roller coaster of emotions
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-25
Updated: 2021-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-16 09:59:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 18,813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29698827
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MatsuFla/pseuds/MatsuFla
Summary: !!! "GALLAVICH UNTIL THE END" REBOOT !!!Looking at Gallavich on screen, did you ever get the feeling that there is so much more behind Cam and Noel's acting?This is my side of the story.
Relationships: Layla Alizada/Noel Fisher, Noel Fisher & Cameron Monaghan, Noel Fisher/Cameron Monaghan
Series: You really think that all those who love each other are together? [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2182563
Comments: 14
Kudos: 22





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [L'amore non basta (2012)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29357877) by [MatsuFla](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MatsuFla/pseuds/MatsuFla). 



> "Gallavich until the end" was my first ever fanfic. I wrote it shortly after I arrived in the fandom, at that time I was not aware of many things and this led me to make serious mistakes in writing the story. I started translating and publishing it but then I realized that I couldn't continue without correcting the mistakes, so I decided to start all over again.  
> I am now much more informed and have collected more "material" to make the story more accurate and credible.  
> As usual, to compensate for my lack of talent in writing, the fic contains references (also dialogues, etc) to Shameless in the first place, but also to many other sources [I hope to be able to make a list of all the sources at the end] like various TV series, manga, videogames, fanfics, real life, dreams I've had and a lot of fantasy.
> 
> I hope that even those who have already read the "first incomplete edition" will give this new version a chance, because, although it is the same story, it is enormously different.
> 
> The new fic is sooooo much more copious than the original and for this reason it will be divided into a collection called "You really think that all those who love each other are together?"  
> The collection will consist of 9 (or more) fanfics, one for each year, from 2012 to 2020 (+ any special caps).

  
<https://i.ibb.co/Sm8qfRn/Love-isn-t-enough-2012.jpg>

Getting back to work on Shameless was always a joy for Cameron. Wandering around Warner Bros Studios always put him in a good mood, perhaps because he had so many fond memories of the two years he spent with the other cast members who were now like a family to him there. In a short time he had made a very strong bond with them and couldn”t wait to see them all again.  
In the morning they would gather for the first meeting for the new episodes and then in the late afternoon there would be the cast party that would be the official start to the shooting of the third season.  
Cam didn't know what to expect after leaving Ian troubled by his mother's crazy Thanksgiving gesture and embroiled in an affair with Jimmy/Steve's father.  
One thing he knew for sure, Ian would still have a thing with Mickey Milkovich since he had received confirmation from Noel himself, the last time they had spoken on the phone. From the first months they had worked together, they had always kept in touch and often exchanged a few calls to catch up on the latest news.  
"Who knows, maybe we will finally get to be together!" Noel had joked when he called to tell him that he had signed the contract as a regular for the third season and Cam had laughed, even if after all he too wanted a little serenity for his poor character.  
Ian Clayton Gallagher has always been one of those really intricate and multi-layered characters, with an inner struggle going on. He is gay but never does anything that is stereotypically perceived as 'gay'. He's tough, smart, smokes, enjoys porn, he's in the R.O.T.C. and has a lot of sex, particularly with her married Muslim boss. Virtually unlike any gay teen on television at the time. Roles like these are very rare for such young actors. A fantastic opportunity for Cameron to show off his great acting skills.  
But he had to admit that the writers were really fucking geniuses for coming up with such a development. Since he turned eighteen, the authors felt freer to explore with his character. It was a challenge that thrilled him a lot!

  
He was the last to arrive at the meeting. The rest of the cast and crew were already busy saying hello, laughing, joking and waiting to start. Cam had missed all his friends but in particular he was impatient to see his on screen brother Jeremy and... Noel.  
Well, it's understandable... with Jeremy he had shared many scenes in the previous two seasons, they were just over two years apart and for Cam he had become the older brother he had never had. With Noel, on the other hand, he had spent little time on the set, in the first two series Mickey had not been given much screen time.The two of them hadn’t even done the so-called ‘chemistry reading’ that is normally done during castings, because Noel should have stayed for only a few episodes, but everyone noticed the potential of his character and the extremely positive response of the audience convinced the authors to make him a regular. Although they had never seen each other before the shoot, there was a chemistry out of the ordinary, like a strong connection between them since the beginning. Not only on the set, very often even when the work was finished the two boys enjoyed spending time together, alone or with the rest of the cast. The almost ten year age gap never made a difference to one another.Nine years... even if it seemed impossible it was the truth and Cam still found it hard to believe that Noel was not his own age.  
He was literally overwhelmed by everyone when they realized he had arrived. After hugs, pats on the shoulders and various greetings he managed to free himself and reach Jeremy who was waiting for him on the sidelines with Emma. Those two, like their characters on the show, seemed to have started dating during the filming of the second season, to the delight of the more discerning fans who already understood this and the delight of Cam who was very fond of both of his friends. Even though it hadn't been officially announced their relationship was obvious to everyone around them. In any case, they were stuck together at all times.  
While he was talking to his friends, he found himself, without realizing it, looking through the crowd with his eyes, until he suddenly felt a slap on the back of the head and whirled around.  
“Damn, Monaghan, you've grown even more!" Noel jokingly scolded him.  
“I'm in full physical development, counting on growing a lot more. So stop whining, Fisher!" Cam replied, sporting a sarcastic smile.  
"Have you decided to make us all look bad?" Noel asked, raising his eyebrows at Jeremy who looked down with a chuckle, feeling decidedly called into question.  
"Dude, what happened to your head? You're blond!" The tall man reached out to Noel's head and ruffled his hair. Cam knew very well that Noel was actually a very blond guy with some adorable nerdy glasses, but after all that time it still felt strange to see him so different from Mickey.  
"Yeah, in a couple of days I will go back to being the dark, tattooed and blossomed Milkovich I have always been."  
"And also dirty." Cameron added immediately, laughing heartily. Everyone laughed with him knowing full well what he was referring to.  
"Yeah, I seriously hope that the dirtiest white boy in America finds the pleasure of taking a shower every now and then." He said scratching his nose with his thumb.  
"We'll be back to being Milkovichs soon!" Emma continued, making a tough grimace and raising her middle finger. Everyone laughed again.  
The location of the party was a beautiful terrace overlooking a spectacular view of LA. On the walls only a few extremely simple decorations, minimal tables and sofas, nothing luxurious, unlike the guests who were all dressed up. Emmy and Shanola stood out among the guests , beautiful as always, sporting tight clothes and dazzling smiles. The little ones of the Gallaghers played at chasing each other while Emma was already behaving like a little woman, sitting in her elegant dress, laughing at Steve and Justin's jokes that amused the company as usual.  
It was a quiet party, chatter and laughter echoed everywhere. Everyone's conversations were mainly divided between comments on expectations on new episodes of the show, updates on their personal lives and the sweltering heat of that scorching summer.  
Time seemed to fly between photos to post on social media and laughter. Unfortunately for Cam, the two people he most wanted to spend time with were kept away from him all night. Every now and then he managed to exchange a few glances from afar with Jeremy and with Noel, and he always pulled away with a smile and a shrug of resignation.  
As night fell, a few at a time, everyone left the party, but Jeremy still seemed too lively to go home. He slipped between Cam and Noel, who had finally managed to carve out some time to talk, and grabbing them by the arm he suggested that they go to some place to drink some more because, according to him, the night was still too young to go to sleep.  
The two men looked at each other and, exchanging a smile, accepted the offer. So the three boys, with Emma of course, left the party and headed to the bar where they used to hand out after work nights from the very beginning of Shameless. The place in question had a private room where they could relax away from the eyes of unsuspecting fans.

  
After a couple of beers there was still talk of how shocking it had been for Emma to discover that Mandy would run over Karen and reduce her to an almost vegetative state. Anyone would have been traumatized but Mandy didn't seem to care at all. Sometimes the Milkovichs frightened her to death.  
They spent a couple of hours talking about mostly bullshit, as usual.  
When Jeremy, throwing the shell of a peanut at the empty glass a few inches from him, could not hit it, he realized that it was time to go home and suggested that Emma who was more messed up than him, that they share a taxi.   
"Are you coming too?" He asked as he helped Emma get to her feet.  
Cam was already about to get up when he heard Noel answer.  
"Maybe we'll stay a little longer." He looked at Jeremy, then turned to Cam, "Shall we, redhead?" He smiled, winking.  
Redhead? Only Mickey called him that!  
A shiver ran down his pale back.  
“You bet your ass! I've been waiting all day!" Cameron sported the most flamboyant smile in his repertoire, accompanying his words with a clenched fist tap on the table.  
“Well, I see you've already dropped into the characters. Don't do too much damage, you SouthSide hooligans." Jeremy said, as he was leaving.  
Noel spoke mostly of his latest works in various films and TV series, while Cam stared at him, enchanted by his stories, his way of gesturing, his voice, his eyes... he kept staring at him.  
He began to feel his body temperature rising, he looked away for a few seconds,looked around for something to fan himself with, then went back to staring at Noel.  
The more time he spent with him the more he realized that although Noel was extremely different from Mickey, they both had the same charm. Maybe Cam was beginning to understand why Ian was so attracted to the Milkovich boy.  
"It's incredible, isn't it?" Noel said in a high pitched tone that brought Cam back to reality, surprised by the weirdness of his own thoughts.  
"Uh... yeah, I can't believe it, man!" He answered completely blindly since he hadn’t listened to a single word for several minutes. His stomach was upside down, it seemed as if the peanuts and chips he had eaten had started a fierce internal struggle, perhaps he had gone too far with the appetizers.  
He realized that Noel had been talking the whole time... about who knows what... until even the blond realized that the boy wasn't listening to him.  
"Are you okay? Sorry, I'm boring you."  
"No, not at all! Sorry, is that... I'm on fire. Don't you find it hellishly hot in here?" He said, wiping the sweat from his forehead.  
"Yeah,it’s hot as balls tonight." Noel agreed, seeing his friend in trouble, "Come on, let's go outside."  
Cam thought that the alcohol was having a strange effect on him, perhaps he had drank a bit too much beer that night. He thought the best thing was to go to sleep.  
They paid and left.  
Once outside Noel put a hand on Cam's left side and with a hint of concern in his eyes asked him if he felt better. At that moment the boy's heart skipped a beat, with a snap he freed himself from the touch of the blond, sought the support of the nearest street lamp and hid his face with his arm.  
"What the fuck is going on?" He thought as he felt his cheeks burn.  
"Bruh, you're drunk!" Noel laughed as he saw the redhead look away as he lifted his arm from his face, "Come on, I'll take you to bed."  
At those equivocal words, Cam felt a strange embarrassment, couldn’t even look him in the face and didn’t understand why.  
They decided that Cam was unable to drive and that Noel would give him a ride home. Heading for the car, Noel and Cam walked very close, although the sidewalk was wide, both with their hands in their pockets and staring down. Every now and then they bumped into each other, the fault of a few too many glasses, and every time they burst out laughing like two children... it was definitely the fault of a few too many glasses!  
A tangle of thoughts crowded Cam's mind, a little clouded by alcohol.  
There were still many things he wanted to tell him and just as many things he wanted to ask him but unexpectedly only one question came out of his mouth.  
"So... how's it going with Layla?" Green eyes fixed on the floor.  
"Huh?" Noel replied absently, as if the question had distracted him from his thoughts, "Fine, pretty good."  
"How long have you been together now?" In fact, he already knew the answer.  
"Six years..." He replied with a sigh and a hint of a smile, "More or less."  
"Fuck, six years." Cam repeated, raising his eyebrows.  
"Yep." That was all Cam received in response before silence began to dominate. The two continued walking without looking at each other until the redhead broke the silence.  
"When will you marry her?" He asked almost in a whisper.  
"W-what? Why?" Noel jumped, taken aback.  
"How why?" A laugh escaped the youngest... a bit bitter.  
"No." and then immediately, "I mean, yes... she... she's fantastic." Noel stammered, "Really, really fantastic."  
"So what?" Cam insisted, not at all satisfied with the answer, "Will you marry her?"  
«O-of course I will...» Said the blond, still looking unconvinced, «She's fantastic. Really great. "  
"So when?"  
"Well, we've never talked about it, that is... Jesus Cam, why do you insist so much on the wedding story?" Noel didn't seem angry, just a little tried by the boy's insistent questions.  
Working on Shameless was a constant surprise, the actors themselves discovered what would happen, week by week, when they received the script just before shooting, but sometimes some news could inevitably leak out. They learned that this would be Laura's last year in the series. Karen, in fact, would have badly left the scene due to a car accident at the hands of Mandy. The new entry Isidora Goreshter, on the other hand, would have become a recurring presence because... yes, she would have married Mickey.  
That was a big surprise for everyone, especially for Cameron who was particularly shocked. He'd been mulling it over all day and didn't stop doing it until then, when he finally spat out what he thought.  
"Nothing, it's just that... you know, with Mickey getting married this season, I thought..."  
Noel stopped suddenly and burst out laughing, the redhead stopped to look at him in amazement.  
Was what he said so absurd?  
Cam thought that Mick's wedding would inevitably remind Noel that the time has come for him to marry his longtime girlfriend... so fantastic... and certainly so lucky.  
"Mickey's wedding isn't going to be the best, but for now that's the only wedding on the agenda." Noel started laughing even harder. That thought that had plagued Cam didn't seem to have touched Noel in any way. The redhead felt relieved, once again inexplicably, and let himself be infected by the blond's laughter, but it only lasted for a moment.  
"Well, if she is so fantastic..." Cam whispered, going back to looking down.  
"Yes." He said turning serious and he too lowered his eyes, "She really is."  
They started walking again and silence fell again and continued all the way in the car, filled only by the music playing on the radio. Arriving in front of the house, Cam invited his friend to come in to play video games but he politely declined the offer.  
"I can't." He whispered disconsolately, "I have to go home."  
"Do you have a curfew?"  
“No, it's just… I've been away from home practically all day. I should at least be back before Layla goes to sleep. " He shrugged and a stretched smile appeared on his lips, "You know... say goodnight, some cuddles and stuff."  
Noel was playing nervously with his slightly sweaty hands, keeping his eyes fixed on his fingers clenched behind the wheel when Cam hit him with a playful shoulder.  
"Come on, it's not that late." He kept hitting him until Noel decided to look at him smiling... with that usual beautiful and contagious smile.  
"Let's have a couple of games of Mortal Kombat and end the night with a stirrup shot."  
“You're already drunk, man. You would end up K.O. in two seconds." He teased him, "And if I drank more, I wouldn't be able to drive either."  
"I have an extra bed for guests." Cam said, unsure if it was still a joke or a desperate attempt to get him to stay. He just knew that he didn't want him to go away, to leave him alone.  
What harm was there?  
He just wanted to have some fun with his friend he hadn't seen in a long time.  
"As much as I like the idea of a sleepover at 28 years old..." He laughed "I think I'll prefer the sleepover with my girlfriend who's waiting for me at home."  
"You suck Noel!" He snorted, "You don't die if you stay away for a night."  
“Come on, Cam, let's catch up soon. We expect something like eight loooong months of work." He teased him, "We'll spend so much time together that eventually I won't want to see you again."  
"I can't stand you right now!"  
"But you just invited me to a sleepover."  
"Shut up, Fisher!" He tried everything to look offended, but he couldn't help but smile. Noel greeted him with a pat on the back as he got out of the car, "Goodnight to you too, Monaghan!"  
When Cameron closed the door, he heard a hum behind him and turned to find Noel leaning forward to the window that was open.  
"How about if I take you to retrieve the car tomorrow morning?"  
Cam wanted to accept… fuck, he wanted to say yes so hard.  
"Mh, no... don't worry." Instead he said disconsolately, “Tomorrow my friend Liana is coming to see me. She will give me a lift."  
He made a mental note to remember to scold one of his best friends for the bad timing of her visit.  
"Liana, huh?" He repeated winking and raised his eyebrows, "So... have fun!"

~~~*~~~

Cameron was feeling weird, he had only had a couple of beers but he felt drunk, confused, a little sad and a little euphoric at the same time. Alcohol had never had that effect on him, not even when he had much more on nights out with his friends,   
He simply decided not to think about it, went to bed and fell asleep within minutes.

~~~*~~~

Once home, Noel found his girlfriend blissfully asleep. After a brief stop in the bathroom to get ready to sleep, he crawled into bed next to her, being careful not to wake her.  
He lay awake for a while thinking that playing video games all night with Cam wouldn't be such a bad idea after all.

~~~*~~~

Cameron and Noel still had no idea, but very soon, everything would change for the two of them.

**Author's notes:**  
Unfortunately, the site often deletes the images included in the story, but in many chapters the images are fundamental, so under each image I leave you the link to be able to view them on imgbb.

-I recommend reading the [Cameron's interview](https://www.vanityfair.com/culture/2011/01/shameless-gay-teen-cameron-monaghan-is-the-anti-kurt-hummel) for the first season of Shameless.


	2. Chapter 2

  
<https://i.ibb.co/Sm8qfRn/Love-isn-t-enough-2012.jpg>

Filming had started more than a month ago, but time seemed to fly by. On average, one week of work is planned for each episode and, despite the heat, filming proceeded according to schedule.  
Noel arrived ten days after the start, as Mickey was still in the Juvi in the first episode. Although the scenes together for the second episode were few, they were happy to return to the baseball field, their special place, to film the reunion between Ian and Mickey.

  
<https://i.ibb.co/PwF231K/Cap-2-foto-1.png>

On July 26, shooting for 3x03 began and for the whole week Noel and Cam found themselves working in symbiosis.  
Mickey had fucked Angie Zahgo making Ian jealous and Gallagher had fucked Ned Lishman making Milkovich very jealous.  
Both actors had a lot of fun shooting these scenes, something really started to move between their characters, and during the season their weird relationship would have grown much more.  
That morning the final scenes of Ian and Mick were scheduled and, although they were scenes outside the Studios, a location in LA was chosen.  
Shameless worked like that, even though the story was set in Chicago only a fraction of the outdoor scenes were shot in the Wind City, all the interior scenes and the rest of the exterior were shot around California, mostly in LA.  
Cam, Noel, Harry (Ned) and the crew were ready to shoot at ‘The Fountain’. The director kicked off the scene, Ian and Ned left the club and met Mickey, the hooligan beat Ned and the two boys ran away from the police chasing them.  
"Cut, good!" Cried Steve Shill, the director.  
They all moved to the alley where the escape scene ended. As expected by the script Cam and Noel teased and chased each other, laughing happily at their game. It was natural for both of them because that was what they were doing even off the set.  
This time, however, Cam felt a strange sensation from being so close to Noel, a strange tingling in the lower abdomen just where the brunette had put his hand, Noel put his other hand behind his neck and pushed him down making him end up crashed against his chest.

It was a strange but very pleasant sensation, he felt a bomb of euphoria ready to explode and didn’t t want to restrain himself, so he let himself be carried and wrapped his long arms around Noel's hips who went along with his gesture and the two continued until the scene was cut which obviously turned out to be perfect. When the director called the stop, the two boys stopped to catch their breath, not that they had run who knows how long, but they had laughed a lot and still hadn't stopped. They rested with their backs on the brick wall of a building in that narrow alley, side by side, and as Noel avoided the gaze of the redhead in hopes of being able to stop laughing, Cam stared at him. He thought about what had happened for only a few minutes, he couldn't explain that strange sensation, the tingling and the euphoria... in the end he attributed them to the scene he was shooting that was overwhelming and energetic. Besides, it was always fun to work with Noel.  
His train of thoughts was interrupted by Noel who offered him to take a picture, Cam willingly accepted and asked him to send it to him. The brunette fiddled with his cell phone for a while but was then called by someone from the crew and walked away.

~~~*~~~

“Hey, no, guys, guys. No fucking guns, all right? It's just a drunk old lady in there!"  
They were all focused on working on one of the last scenes of the 3x05, the scene of the long-awaited first kiss. Cam had only one line and then he had to lend himself to a very simple innocent and delicate kiss like between two elementary school kids. Nothing complicated.  
He had to light a cigarette and wait for Noel to come back to kiss him... and so he did. He noticed that his hands were trembling slightly but he remained staring straight ahead in the van, until he heard a thump that made him spin suddenly, thus finding Noel a few centimeters from his face.  
It was a split second but Cam could clearly hear his heart skip a beat, Noel kissed him and ran away leaving him breathless.

Without realizing it, a smile was drawn on Cam's face as if that kiss was really unexpected, if he could have seen his face at that moment, he would have fooled himself!  
He dropped his head back onto the seat and took a breath.  
While the other kept shooting inside the house, Cam was given a break and walked away from the set still a little dazed. In all his life he had never even thought of kissing a boy, he had kissed Kash in the first season, even that was a simple kiss that left him completely indifferent.  
This time he found himself thinking that kissing a boy hadn't been so bad, that is... not that he had liked it, not in that sense, of course, he wasn't gay, just... it just wasn't that terrible.  
If he had told Noel about all this, he would have made fun of him and, just thinking about it, laughed at himself.

~~~*~~~

It was around eight when the pizza guy finally rang the doorbell. Cam was lying on the sofa studying the script for the sixth episode which would start filming shortly. He had a quick glance at the scene at Kash and Grab, those at the group home with Jeremy and the romantic evening at the Milkovich house, but for more than half an hour he had been stopping to read and reread the grand finale. Terrible.  
He moved into the kitchen, took a can of A&W Root Beer from the fridge and sat down, slid a little in the chair and crossed his legs on the table, right next to the open pizza box. He resumed his reading until he was suddenly distracted by his cell phone whistling the classic Whatsapp tune. It was a message from Noel.  
They had met that morning at the table read which left the entire cast speechless. There was no more pertinent title than ‘Cascading Failures’ for that episode, which was amazing, sure, sweet and bitter, in perfect Shameless style.  
At the end of the meeting, John Wells asked Cam and Noel to stay a few more minutes to discuss some scenes. Sex and physical and sexual violence... it was a lot to metabolize and work on.  
On sex, John immediately pointed out that it wouldn't be like other times. It was assumed that Ian and Mickey had fucked right away, but it had never been shown, it had always been left to the imagination of the viewers. The only time they had let a glimpse of anything, namely Ian's butt, was in 2x08, when Frank caught them along with Kash and Grab.  
On that occasion Wells had left them free to do what they wanted, even decide the position to stage, but the scene lasted only a few seconds and the two actors were fully dressed, except, precisely, only for Cam's butt.  
This time, according to John, it would have been a more explicit, more intense, deeper, more realistic scene... and God knows how many ‘more’ there had been, but Noel and Cam hadn't heard them since at a certain point they had stopped listening to him, preferring instead to exchange complicit glances and smirk off your face thinking about how much they would have teased him once the meeting was over.  
The hilarity came to a halt when Wells informed them that at some point the shoot would require full nudity from both of them.  
Noel and Cameron looked at each other, worried at first, but then they smiled.  
Whatever... they could do it.  
Cam took another bite of the slice of pizza he was holding before putting it down, then picked up his cell phone and opened the message.

(1)  
Dude (08.27 pm): Hey  
Dude (08.27 pm): What are you doing?  
Bruh (08.27 pm): Having dinner and studying the lines a bit  
Dude (08.28 pm): What are you eating?  
Bruh (08.28 pm): Pizza  
Dude (08.28 pm): Lucky you. I have steamed broccoli  
Bruh (08.28 pm): Did you go on a diet?  
Dude (08.29 pm): Yes, I have to be naked in front of all of America  
Dude (08.29 pm): Plus I don't wanna look bad in front of you  
Bruh (08.29 pm): You got no chance  
Dude (08.29 pm): 🖕🏻  
Bruh (08.29 pm): Have you started using emoticons?  
Dude (08.29 pm): Only this 🖕🏻  
Bruh (08.29 pm): I regret teaching you how to do it  
Dude (08.29 pm): 🖕🏻  
Bruh (08.32 pm): I'm on that scene right now  
Dude (08.32 pm): There aren't many lines to study  
Bruh (08.32 pm): Work on interpretation  
Dude (08.32 pm): Do you train yourself to be more ‘intense’?  
Dude (08.32 pm): Or more ‘realistic’?  
Bruh (08.33 pm): No, I have no problem with that  
Bruh (08.33 pm): I can be very realistic  
Bruh (08.33 pm): You'll see soon enough  
Dude (08.33 pm): 🖕🏻  
Bruh (08.33 pm): But I have some doubts about the depth...  
Bruh (08.33 pm): How deep are you?  
Dude (08.34 pm): You're a fucking dick  
Bruh (08.34 pm): Yeah, I hope you're deep enough.

Cam stood looking at his cell phone waiting for an answer or yet another middle finger emoticon, but after a few minutes of nothing coming, he realized the conversation was over.  
The redhead knew perfectly well that Noel wasn’t offended by something he had written, it was nothing compared to their usual jokes. When seen from the outside, what could sometimes seem like an shameless flirtation, was just their usual way of joking that came naturally to them right away and had helped them a lot on set. Their complicity had allowed two straight guys to start a perfectly credible onscreen homosexual relationship.  
Maybe Noel had fallen asleep or his battery ran out or something was keeping him busy. Most likely he had got into a fight with his phone and technology had defeated him, as always.  
Cam didn't push, he just put the cell phone on his lap and retrieved the chewed pizza that was starting to get cold. Two minutes later the phone began to ring, the redhead nearly drowned in amazement to see that it was Noel calling him. He reached out to grab the roll of paper towels on the shelf behind him and tore off a couple, wiped his hands and sauce-smeared lips, tossed the script on the table and sat up. Meanwhile the phone stopped ringing. In the throes of a small panic attack, Cam walked over to the sofa and stared at the black screen for a few minutes before deciding to call back.  
They were always in touch with Whatsapp messages, tags and comments on various social networks, but they didn't call each other that often. Maybe that was why Cam was feeling agitated and his hands were shaking a little, but as soon as he heard Noel's voice all the nervousness suddenly disappeared.  
"You're an asshole!" He began, without even saying hello , but the way the voice rang on the phone you could tell he was laughing.  
"It's part of my charm." The redhead replied, doing the same.  
"Yeah, I guess that's what the girls like so much."  
"You know, they love me!"  
They chat about this and that, joking and laughing for almost an hour. Time seemed to fly by, but Noel had to hang up when his girlfriend called him to go to bed, but not before receiving one last tease from Cam, who accused him of going to bed early like a grandpa.  
Cameron returned to studying the episode, rereading the same scene several times before moving on to finish reading the script. He had also googled 'ben wa balls' because he had no idea what they were, but found himself very interested in wanting to find out.  
His dinner was now cold and soggy so he gave up eating it, he felt full anyway. He turned on the TV, but turned it off almost immediately when he realized he wasn't paying the slightest attention. He washed the dishes left in the sink from lunch, cleaned up the kitchen, put the remains of the pizza in the fridge, and even though it was only ten o'clock, he decided to go to bed. Sincehe had nothing better to do.

  
Although he had been lying in the dark for a while he had not been able to sleep, his mind was traveling fast, jumping here and there. He considered going back to the kitchen to eat the rest of the pizza and it reminded him of Noel and his sad steamed broccoli, he laughed at imagining him eating them with his nose wrinkled unhappily. He wished they could eat pizza together and maybe play video games late, as they always did when they were in Chicago instead.  
Chicago made him think of Shameless and Shameless made him think of the imminent start of filming and so, in a jiffy, his mind was immediately there... to that scene.  
On the script it was described in a simple and minimal way, a few lines and even fewer details on how the sex should have unfolded. Cam had read it so many times that he had memorized it by now, so he closed his eyes and let his imagination work. All this, of course, only for pure professional perfectionism. Cameron Riley Monaghan was a pro, so imagining your co-worker naked and imagining fucking him on the Milkovich sofa was just a way to optimize his performance on set. There was absolutely nothing wrong with that.  
In the midst of his fantasy, Cam was disturbed by the cell phone whistling from the nightstand, the initial annoyance turning into a smile as he glanced at the display.  
As if in a séance the spirits from the underworld were evoked with the power of thought, thinking deeply about Noel... naked and bent at 90 on the sofa... made him suddenly manifest in the form of a Whatsapp message. Apparently he was still awake too.

Dude (10.16 pm): I forgot to send you this  
Dude (10.16 pm):  
  
<https://i.ibb.co/fNXB9zT/Cap-2-foto-4.jpg>  
Bruh (10.19 pm): I look dreamy, but you have a dumb face

Actually Cam had thought the exact opposite. At that point he expected the usual middle finger emoticon, but Noel left him completely blown away.

Dude (10.19 pm): True

In the darkness of the room, it was hard to tell if it was his cell phone that was lighting up his radiant face or the other way around.

Dude (10.20 pm): Goodnight, Cam.  
Bruh (10.20 pm): Goodnight, Noel.

Cam reread the messages they'd exchanged that night a couple of times, then saved the photo and stared at it until he fell asleep.

~~~*~~~

"Hey Red, you wanna come over later?"  
Noel had been missing during all the filming of the fourth episode, where Mickey was again absent, so the two boys hadn't seen each other for a whole week.  
“Layla's not at home, we could order a pizza and watch Double Impact. I kinda wanna to see it. What do you say?"  
That proposal seemed great to Cameron, but he tried to stay as serious as possible.  
"Was I just invited to a sleepover?" He smiled, unable to refrain from using Ian's joke.  
Noel could only answer in one way: "Fuck you, is what you were invited to!"  
They looked at each other and exchanged a toothy smile.  
Obviously it was a yes.

(1) Dude & Bruh  
During an exchange of comments on IG, Cam and Noel joked with each other by these names. It was a Noel Post from 2020, but I enjoyed thinking it might be a more grounded and long-standing game between them.


	3. Chapter 3

  
<https://i.ibb.co/Sm8qfRn/Love-isn-t-enough-2012.jpg>

Cam's bedroom was a complete mess. Disorder reigned everywhere, clothes and contraptions of all kinds were scattered in every corner, there was stuff everywhere. The bathroom door was open and all the lights were on.  
The redhead looked wrecked, he kept pacing back and forth between the bedroom and the bathroom, sighing. He stopped to stare at the wide open closet, now almost empty, with his hands on his hips and then puffing he went to the bathroom to fix his hair and then up and down again... three, four, five, ten times!  
He kept changing his shirt, pants and shoes... not even his hair seemed to satisfy him, despite being very short, he had tried to pull it up, crush it down and then pushed it back.  
If he had been accepting an Oscar he would have been less nervous.  
He thought he wanted to put some cologne on too, so he opened the mirror cabinet above the sink but with the door accidentally hit the hairdryer that was hanging on a hook on the wall. The hair dryer with a daring flight landed on his foot making him jump from pain.  
"Shit!" He yelled, massaging his foot, then looked up and saw his image in the mirror... gel in his hair, white shirt and dark pants.  
"What the hell am I doing?" He sighed, “Seriously, Cameron? Are you completely crazy?" He said to his reflection.  
"What's wrong with me?" He kept muttering, messing with his hair, "It's just Noel!"  
He went back to the bedroom and put on a green tank top and a pair of Bermuda shorts.  
"This is ridiculous, absolutely ridiculous!" He grabbed his cell phone and the room key from the bedside table and put them in his pocket, then went out closing the door behind him. After ten seconds the door opened again and Cam went straight back to the bathroom where, in front of the mirror, he murmured, "Okay, just one last hair fix."

  
"You're late!" Noel said as he welcomed his friend who instead merely shrugged him off without saying anything.  
"I'll get the beers from the fridge, you start the movie."  
After 109 minutes of fights and explosions the two boys were ecstatic and fully satisfied with the choice. During the movie, Cam would often look out of the corner of his eye, observing Noel, illuminated only by the colored light of the TV. A couple of times their eyes had met and the two had smiled at each other. Cam remembered the scene shot in the afternoon between Ian and Mickey that portrayed them in exactly the same situation. He felt very close to Ian at that moment.  
"Ian wasn't wrong, this Van Damme is really a-" Noel started saying.  
"Van Double Damn!" They said together and then laughed.  
"Hey, do you want to play Mario Kart?" Noel asked.  
«Mario Kart? Damn, Noel, how old are you?"  
«Come on, Cam! Layla never lets me stay up late when she's home."  
"Are you serious?" He just couldn't hold back a big laugh, "Noel, seriously, how old are you?"  
"It's just that I prefer to do something else with Layla." Noel said quietly, but from the expression that appeared on Cam's face, the brunette knew immediately that he was misunderstood.  
"No, I didn't mean that..." He added a little agitated, "I mean, yes, we do that too, but-"  
"Forget it, Noel..." Cam interrupted, "I don't care what you do with your girlfriend." The redhead laughed without amusement, on the contrary, a bit bitterness appeared and Noel seemed to notice. A couple of minutes passed in which the two neither spoke nor looked at each other. Finally, Noel let out a whisper.  
"We don't do it that often anyway." He had his eyes fixed on his nervously intertwined hands and a sad smile just hinted at.  
Cam felt a slight and unwarranted sense of relief at hearing those words, but at the same time, he hated seeing Noel in that state. He wouldn't let anyone or anything ruin their night, so he decided to go back to more cheerful tones.  
"So?" He said all perky and Noel looked at him confused.  
«You start Mario Kart, or not? Come on, I don't have all night." He urged him to get up by pushing him with a pat behind the back and Noel humored him, prepared the game and went back to the sofa with a big smile on his lips.  
"I choose Donkey Kong!"

  
"Fuuuuuck, again? It's impossible!" Cam exclaimed, putting his hands in his hair after losing yet another game. It was just after midnight and the two of them were still on the sofa playing games.  
"You suck, Monaghan!" Noel chuckled, "And I don't understand why you keep choosing the monkey."  
"Ah sure, 'cause Wario is much better..."  
"Everything is handsome about Wario, you need to get a really good power, not stupid power like banana or something."  
Cam got up laughing from the sofa and greeted Noel as he headed for the door.  
"Are you leaving already? Don't you want revenge?" The older man had the look of a child who asks his mother for ten more minutes to play.  
"We'll talk about it when you challenge me to a serious game!"  
"Oh, what a poor sport, I massacred you! I screwed your ass, bruh!" Noel sat cross-legged and improvised a mocking ballet swinging frantically.  
Cam leaned forward reaching a few inches from Noel's face, "Well, enjoy it while it lasts, because tomorrow I'll be-screwing-your-ass!" He said making the sign of the quotation marks with his hands and pronouncing the words with a bold smile on his face.  
"You better go to rest, because a heavy day awaits you, dude!"  
It took Noel a couple of seconds to grasp the provocation, he sported a defiant grin, he raised his eyebrows and ran his tongue over his teeth. He grabbed the redhead by the neckline of the tank top and dragged him down onto the sofa and onto himself and immediately immobilized him against his chest, squeezing his arm around Cam's neck and with the other hand he scratched his head ruffling his red hair.  
"No, not the hair!" He complained as he freed himself from the brunette's grip, then he immediately went on the counterattack and both exchanged a series of taps on the arms and chest. They went on like this until he gasped from too much laughter and Noel raised his hands in surrender. Both leaned back on the sofa and brought their heads back until they saw the ceiling. They stayed a few minutes to catch their breath, avoiding looking at each other so they wouldnt to start laughing again, but they still couldn't stop smiling.  
Suddenly Noel's pocket started to vibrate, so the boy took out his cell phone and answered the call. Cam nodded to indicate that he was leaving but the other asked him to stay and pointed insistently to the sofa with his forefinger, then, after apologizing, went to the bathroom and closed the door behind him.  
The redhead sat in silence for a few seconds, then decided to start a new match on the game. It didn't take long for Noel to get back, jumped on the couch, grabbed the controller and took the game off the break.  
"Just a match!" Cam specified. He knew very well who was on the phone but pretended nothing.  
"Layla says hello." Noel said, keeping his eyes on the TV.  
"Tell her I said Hi back." He replied doing the same. He thought that maybe he should say something else, ask how she was or something. Usually he did, but since he had seen Noel this time he had never done it. Honestly, he didn't care. So he was silent and his friend didn't seem to mind it.  
"Have you met Isidora?" But this Cam wanted to ask him.  
"Unfortunately no, it will be fun to ask her to undress and rape me at our first meeting!" He obviously was joking but Cam didn't laugh.  
"Did Layla say something?"  
"About sex with the Russian prostitute? No, she is an actress, she knows how our job works." He paused for a moment, then let out a smile that Cam could see out of the corner of his eye.  
"You know, I think she's more worried about sex with the redhead soldier!" He laughed.  
"Good, she should be. Wise woman. You know I am very good in bed, you might even like it, you know?"  
"What now, you're teasing me again? You should concentrate on the game instead of saying nonsense. " He said unperturbed, "Look, you've lost again!"  
"It doesn't matter, I'll take my revenge tomorrow." Replied the redhead, rising from the sofa.  
"What does that mean?" Noel asked worriedly.  
"Nothing, it's just that, if I were you, I would watch my back..." He laughed, heading for the door, "Literally!"  
"W-what? Come on, don't mess with other men's butts!" An increasingly worried Noel threw a pillow at the beanpole that laughed even louder.  
"Noel Fisher, you messed with the wrong guy!" He shouted, before closing the door behind him. He stood outside for a few seconds, the muscles in his face tugging and he put a hand on his cheek. He felt the way the smile tighten against his palm and marveled as he rested his head against the door. He enjoyed that feeling for a few minutes and then went home.

~~~*~~~

Cam was not nervous at all, although he would soon be completely naked in front of the cameras and the crew, it was certainly not the first time. Although he had never experienced any of this 'gay stuff' in his life, he didn't feel too uncomfortable portraying Ian's troubled love and sex life.  
While working on Shameless he had already had to kiss Kash and Mickey, 'struggled' naked with Ned and even simulated a sex act with a random guy a few weeks earlier in 3x02.

  
<https://i.ibb.co/ykbSBDz/Cap-3-foto-1.jpg>

Even Noel was there, relaxed enough in his blue dressing gown, already in position for the scene. Cam was sitting on the sofa, while the brunette was standing behind the camera and the two were exchanging jokes and smiles from a distance making the crew laugh.  
"Take it easy, Monaghan. I swear that if you get carried away by enthusiasm-"  
"Relax Fisher, no one has ever been dissatisfied." Cam interrupted him, "Your sexy lil ass is in good hands!"  
"If I were you, I would cool it with the witty, tough guy. I wanna remind you that I'm armed with ben wa balls!"  
"Was it a threat or a proposal?" Cam felt particularly cheeky, "Don't think about it and enjoy the moment!"  
"You are in a very delicate position, Noel." Yelled someone from the staff.  
"You better not make him angry!" Someone else added and Noel nodded with a bitter laugh.  
"Relax." The red chuckled, getting a smile and a middle finger from the brunette in response. A few minutes later everyone was ready to begin.  
Cam was calm, confident, he had experienced that scene so many times... in his head... that there was no way he could make any mistakes. All his certainty, however, collapsed as soon as they were both stripped of their dressing gowns and stood looking at each other with nothing but those ridiculous 'cock socks'. When the tape started spinning and Noel advanced towards him, the redhead felt that strange euphoria permeate his whole body again. Cam smiled at him mischievously when he found him a few inches while waving that hellish thing in his tattooed hands before his eyes.  
"Wanna do the honors?" He said from the script. Noel seemed perfectly at ease too, as if it were normal for them to be naked facing each other.

"Is that a rosary for giants?" The tinkling of ben wa beads, which were now in his hands, strangely teased him.  
"No. No, man, they're ben wa beads. You shove them in my ass, and you pull them out real slow."  
"How is that fun for me?"  
The two seemed almost alone in the room because of the naturalness with which they exchanged jokes.  
«Come on... all right, okay. Just easy on the injured cheek."

After throwing the sex toy on the floor, Cam gently pushed Noel to lean on the sofa.  
"I'll just go on the one, all right?"  
"Yeah."  
While Cam behind him didn’t stop smiling blissfully, Noel's laugh was a little more nervous. There seemed to be a bit of embarrassment on his face, that is, it's okay to have a strong confidence, but here we were definitely about to cross the border.  
"Relax." Cam said and Noel, thinking back to just before, smiled.  
Cam did not know what the etiquette was in these cases, what was the most appropriate distance to maintain without falling back into sexual harassment at work. He did not know if real contact between his penis and Noel's ass was expected, but seeing the boy bent over the back of the Milkovich sofa made him shiver all along his back. At that moment the tingling in the lower abdomen returned to visit him and Cam lost control, he could not resist, so he canceled the distance between them in a moment and began to rub with the sock, and everything that was inside, against Noel's butt and immediately felt Noel stiffen under him on contact.  
The smiles immediately disappeared from both of their faces and the room began to fill with grunts and gasps that definitely didn't help.  
It was all so damn strange. The tingling in his lower abdomen became more and more insistent and he was shocked to perceive a feeling of... excitement?  
Was he horny?  
Unfortunately for Cam, to make matters worse, there was something else that was starting to stiffen. He managed panic as a true professional, merely moving away from Noel as much as possible, praying that the other had not noticed his... 'big problem'.  
The redhead had one hand on his shoulder and one on his hips, his grip firmly and he kept pushing. He looked up and forced himself to think of something that could calm him, then finally the stop came.  
"Cut!" Cried Anthony Hemingway, the director, “It's good. Now let's proceed with the second angle."  
Of course, because as per standard procedure, the same scene was repeated several times from different angles. Sometimes a fifteen-second sex scene could take up to six hours of work.  
Cam was in serious trouble but didn't show it, at least until it was time to take off the sock.  
It was the last take of that damn scene that ended with Terry coming in, and Ian parading completely naked in front of the camera looking for his boxers, then they would finally move on to the beating scene.  
Cameron and Noel were already in position, waiting, but the start was slow in coming.  
"Okay, all ready." Hemingway warned the crew to prepare to begin, then looked at the camera angle on the small screen in front of him and wrinkled his nose.  
"Cam, stay closer." He screamed, raised his hands above his head and pounded his fists together, demanding that there be contact between them.  
Cam nodded, but remained motionless. So, without warning, it was Noel who backed up to touch him and when they were skin to skin, Cam's body reacted instantly.  
"Fuck!" He jumped, pulling back immediately, "Sorry, Noel."  
Cam figured that, with any luck, Noel would not be able to tell the difference between a retired soldier and one ready to go at the drop of a hat, being the first time for him to have a dick attached to his ass.  
"Hey, cowboy, stop thinking about your girlfriend." Noel was resting with his elbows on the back of the sofa, he spoke to him, turning his head slightly but without getting to look him in the eyes. Cam, however, noticed that the other one beneath him was smiling.  
«I assure you that you are already credible enough. So relax, okay?" He said mockingly and made the redhead laugh.  
Damn. Noel probably understood everything, or maybe not. In any case, his words and amused smile eased the tension and Cam was able to go back to work with more serenity. Terry's entry was expected after a few seconds but to Cam it seemed like an eternity. He simulated a couple of firm pushes, keeping his distance this time, and was tremendously relieved to hear the stop.  
Unfortunately, when it came time for Noel to take off the sock, contrary to what Cam had hoped and dreamed of, Ian was dramatically out of the game.  
Although Isidora was naked in front of him he didn't look at her at all, but he couldn't even see Noel because the girl's body was blocking his view. He tried to peek a couple of times, without insisting, he didn't want anyone catching him looking at his co-worker's dick, it was unprofessional and downright embarrassing.  
As soon as they started filming the heartbreaking rape scene though, Cam was immediately sucked into the tragedy and horror of that moment and everything else disappeared. The set and crew no longer existed, there was just Ian, Mickey and their cursed life slowly consuming them.  
"Hey, Red, at least I expect you to offer me dinner!" Noel joked when filming ended and the two made it to their trailers.  
"Even two, Noel, you are all worth it!"

~~~*~~~

Cam was lying on his bed on his side. Around him the silence is broken only by the twirl of the fan on the ceiling of his bedroom. The yellow light of the street lamps came in through the open window, it didn't draw a wind. Cam raised a hand to his forehead in an attempt to calm the great confusion in his head.  
Was he horny?  
Over a boy?  
With Noel?  
No!  
Absolutely not!  
He thought that as soon as he had some free time he would have to go out with some girl, besides alcohol and the heat also the abstinence began to play bad jokes on him. After a few minutes staring at the ceiling, he took his cell phone and opened the chat to text Noel.  
‘I was thinking about your sexy ass and it came back to me that I owe you a dinner 😏😂 Shall we have sushi near your house tomorrow night at eight? I'll pick you up.’  
He reread it a couple of times, thought about it a bit and erased it. He resumed writing, opting for something less daring.  
‘Don't think I forgot about the dinner I owe you. Do you still like sushi?’  
He reread it a couple of times, thought about it a bit and erased it. He put his cell phone on the bedside table and went to sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

  
<https://i.ibb.co/Sm8qfRn/Love-isn-t-enough-2012.jpg>

The days when the shoot moved to Chicago were the best for the cast, everyone loved the Windy City and it always felt like taking a little family vacation.  
That summer they all decided to move up their departure by two days and spend the weekend, when they usually didn't work, together in Chicago.  
Only a small red-haired note was out of tune in the melody of general joy. Cam was down in the dumps because, contrary to his hope of spending every moment with Noel, he found himself with disappointed expectations from the beginning, when his friend decided for some reason to delay his departure, and join them separately later.  
As soon as they arrived at the hotel, everyone dropped their bags and dashed around the streets of Chicago... all of them except Cam who, with a sudden desire for a shower not at all suspicious, decided to stay in the room and only by chance he later found himself sitting in the hole eating a snack when Noel arrived.

  
<https://i.ibb.co/m8n6sr1/Cap-4-foto-1.png>

The two stayed together all afternoon and for dinner they joined the rest of the cast at one of the many restaurants in town. Back at the hotel, Cam invited Noel to his room, assuming that for the two of them the night would continue for a while longer, since traditionally their days in Chicagus always ended with a chat in one or the other's room. But Noel declined the invitation, he had had to get up very early that morning to get packed and ready for the trip and the flight had been more tiring than usual.  
"And then I have to call Layla..." He said to Cam, "We haven't heard from each other all day and I promised her that this time I wouldn't disappear every night to play video games."

~~~*~~~

To round off those two days of vacation Joan threw a party at her Chicago home. They dined at two long tables in the large dining room with the bay windows that overlooked her backyard. After dinner, different activities had been set up in the rooms on the ground floor of her home. It reminded them of being in summer camp. 

  
<https://i.ibb.co/DW7vsx3/Cap-4-foto-2.png>

Cam and Noel were invited to play Charades, which consisted of miming and guessing movie titles.  
Bill went out of his way to explain the game and everyone surrounded him to listen, but there was one person who wasn't really paying attention. Cam was totally focused on Noel and that green country boy plaid shirt of his, watching him laugh amused by Bill's jokes and responding to his smiles when the blonde turned to him to laugh together at whatever funny thing their colleague was saying at that moment.  
A sudden flash behind him brought him back to reality and his distracted, dreamy expression was captured by Emmy in a photo that she then posted on Instagram.

  
<https://i.ibb.co/x8dpTPY/Cap-4-foto-3.png>

Fortunately, the rules were simple, and after forming the teams and a quick practice round, everyone felt ready to play.  
When after a while it was Noel's turn to mime, the teams no longer existed, they were so scarce that the one who miraculously managed to guess the film won. He fished out a note and snorted a laugh after reading it, looked up at the small group of friends waiting and, among all the eyes on him, he immediately found a pair of green ones staring at him.  
"‘Legally blonde’"!" Cam yelled, even before the blond started miming, making the others laugh. Noel tried to make an annoyed face, but he was the most amused of all.  
"’A fish called Wanda’!" Cam joked again, using the opportunity to make fun of his name, "Or was it ‘A fisher called Wanda’?"  
Noel laughed, but didn't have time to start miming when he heard Cam's voice again.  
"No, wait, I get it!" He was already laughing at the thought of saying it, "It's ‘Littleman’!"  
Noel dedicated both middleweight to him while the group of friends laughed out loud.  
"Wait, wait..." He continued loudly, just enough to overpower everyone's laughter, "It's ‘Brüno’!"  
At that point Noel crumpled the note he had extracted into a small ball and threw it at the funny guy, hitting him on the forehead.  
"Come on, Cam, let him play." Someone said, moved by Noel's pout.  
The blond waited a few seconds in which there was finally silence and glared at Cameron who, with a smile, granted him a truce. So, Noel started miming his film, but after just three seconds a certain redhead guessed the correct title, sparking the complaints of everyone who accused them of cheating.  
"It's not possible, you two are telepathic!" Someone else concluded, while the two exchanged a complicit and amused look.  
"Come on, smartass..." Emmy said, a defiant look in her eyes, "Let's see if you're as good at miming." She pushed Cameron in Noel's place and welcomed the blonde by his side, taking him by the arm.  
Cam fished out a note and Noel wasted no time in taking his revenge.  
"'Pretty Woman'!" It started already loaded, "’Child's play’! He teased him, insinuating a certain resemblance to Chuckie, the creepy doll from the film.  
Amid the general laughter, someone jokingly scolded Noel for giving Cam a chance. The blond raised his hands in surrender and so the redhead began to mimic, but the respite was really short.  
"’The brave’!" He started again, deliberately ignoring what Cam was miming, "No, no..." He cried out laughing again, "’The little mermaid’!"  
Exasperated by that constant teasing and also feeling a little excluded from that game of their own, the group of friends threw in the towel and chased them away. As usual, those two seemed to travel on a separate track, they vibrated on the same frequency that allowed them to understand each other perfectly without even having to speak.  
They moved into the living room, sticking together, where they found some impromptu karaoke in progress. Steve strummed a shiny red guitar while Zach used a beer bottle as a microphone and he was good at singing. Shanola, sitting in the front row, applauded like an avid fan and little Emma... it was not clear what she was doing, but she dispensed tongues and grimaces like a rebellious rock star in a cute red dress. Cam and Noel stayed at the back of the room enjoying the performance and after a few minutes the blonde offered to go and get a drink for both of them while the redhead listened to his friends, but was distracted by a more or less friendly bickering ongoing between Emma and Ethan. She had poked his tongue out and he had taken it as an invitation to torment her. The little brat kept blowing huge bubbles with the gum that he had been chewing loudly for hours, and threatened to pop them in her face, in response, the redhead number two burst all the bubbles with her finger before they could reach her, snorting and giggling at the same time. When Noel returned with the drinks, he invited Cam to come over and take a couple of free chairs near Shanola, sadly they got too close and Cam got involved in the fight. Emma pushed her fake brother a little too hard and the boy, losing his balance, fell to his knees and on top of Cam.  
If for Cameron the fact that Ethan had fallen with his face between his legs wasn't embarrassing enough, and also quite painful, the real drama came as the little brown head lifted and he saw with horror that the gum it had stuck to his pants. He was dumbfounded for a moment, then walked away to try to undo the damage, all the while trying to repress the strong instinct to kill his on screen little brother in cold blood.

  
When Noel walked into the huge bathroom without knocking, he found his friend engaged in an unequal fight against the thick gum stuck to his groin... and he was definitely losing. He watched him rub a scoop of wet toilet paper on the rubber, but all he got from that brilliant idea was that the paper stuck to it. He smiled tenderly behind him as he walked past him to reach the toilet, placed the plastic glass on a cabinet, pulled the zip down and began to pee, very naturally, as if doing it in front of Cam was a common thing.  
The two boys were close sure, but this had never happened before, as great friends as they were they had never had the opportunity to see each other's penis. Noel had definitely 'felt' it when he had more or less involuntarily 'placed it' between his buttocks a couple of times during the shoot, but they had been wearing the 'cock sock' for most of the time and that one time that Noel had been completely naked, Cam had been unable to see anything.  
The redhead, already in difficulty at first, lost all control of his intellectual faculties at the sound of the lowering.  
He instantly forgot what he was doing, the only thing he could think of was that Noel's cock was out of his cage a few meters away from him and in his head an overbearing and mysterious force was ordering him to watch. This time they were alone and the redhead had no intention of letting this unexpected second chance escape.  
The room was very large and the toilet was about ten feet away, plus the angle wasn't very good at all and Cam would have to lean over to see. He did so, without hesitation.  
If in men's bathrooms the urinals are often next to each other, it means that there is nothing wrong with taking a look at the dick next to it, it is pure curiosity.  
Taking advantage of Noel's concentration in hitting the toilet hole, the redhead spied several times, trying to be as cautious as possible, peeking for no more than three seconds at a time. At first... but then, frustrated by the unsatisfactory result, he began to look longer and longer and with greater commitment.  
"That'll only make the situation worse." Noel smiled at him and Cam immediately looked away, just a moment before he was caught spying on his cock.  
"I know. I wanted to use the towel, but I was afraid of staining it. " He resumed scrubbing hard, but only to avoid Noel's gaze when he joined him in front of the mirror.  
“Man, I love these pants. Now I'll have to throw them away. " He gave up disconsolately and threw the shapeless heap of paper into the sink where the blond was washing his hands.  
"Ice." Noel raised his head and finally their gazes found each other.  
"What?"  
The blond ignored Cam's question for a while, wiped his hands and reached for his glass abandoned on the cabinet, raised it in the air as if in a toast and with a big smile on his lips repeated, "You need ice!"  
Noel took a long sip of his soda, took an ice cube in his mouth and held it between his teeth for display before splitting it into his hand.  
Cam couldn't explain how Noel, despite his good boy looks and puppy eyes, was sensual in everything he did. A little ice between his lips was enough for Cameron to feel transported to one of those seedy porn movies where the only plot needed was a broken pipe or a broken down car.  
By then the redhead's mind was already clearly overloaded, so what Noel said next was of no help.  
"Take off your pants."  
"W-what? No! W-why? " He stammered.  
"It's cold, man, do you want to freeze your balls?" He advanced towards him, giggling, but the redhead made no move to lower his breeches.  
"As you wish..." He sighed, "You'll regret it!"  
Cam reached out to get the cube delivered, but Noel gave him the glass instead and, holding the ice in his hand, knelt in front of him. The scene was as if in slow motion, the lower the blond descended, the more the redhead's eyes widened in disbelief. When he lowered his head he saw Noel's face inches from his loins time stopped and Cam stopped breathing.  
"Fuck!" He blew softly as he was abruptly brought back to reality by the bitter cold that easily penetrated through his pants.  
"I told you!" He scolded him knowingly.  
Despite literally having frozen balls, Cam felt himself going up in flames.  
"Did Layla teach you that?" He asked, surprising even himself, unable to understand where that question came from and why he had come up with the name of Noel's girlfriend at a time like this. Perhaps because Cam... for a brief moment... had occurred to the idea that she was lucky enough to have him in that position whenever she wanted to. But he denied himself even thinking about it. No, not even for a brief moment.  
"No, it's an old trick I learned from my mom." Noel said, but Cam had already stopped paying attention to him, too busy trying to sound calm and casual. Noel, on the other hand, seemed very calm.  
He continued to speak freely and spontaneously, perfectly at ease, while Cam gasped and retreated at the touch of the cube that inexorably shrunk, decreasing more and more the distance between Noel's fingers and that sensitive point of his that began to awaken.  
"Once as a child I stuck a chewing gum in my sister's hair." Annoyed by Cam's insistent movements, he grabbed him firmly by the side with one hand and pushed the ice more firmly against him.  
"Fuck!" He sighed again with his voice shaking and his lower lip clamped between his teeth.  
"I know, I know, that was a douche move... but she really pissed me off!"  
Fortunately for Cameron, Noel, focused on what he was doing and saying, did not grasp the true meaning behind that sigh.  
“I don't remember what she did to push me that far, but I sure had my good reasons. Anyway... it took my mother an entire afternoon to take it off." He continued, unaware of everything, "A few locks were impossible to save and she had to cut them off... "  
When Cam looked down and his eyes landed on the blonde head dancing in front of him, rocking up and down, back and forth, losing control was a matter of seconds. He reached out and dipped his fingers into the gold of his hair, so bright and soft, then squeezed and tugged softly. Only when Noel raised his head to look at him, the redhead realized with horror what he had done and instinctively pulled his hand away.  
"Don't worry, Cam!" He laughed lightly, "I'm pretty sure there won't be any need to cut anything away in your case."  
Clearly, not even that time Noel had understood the nature of Cam's gesture and the boy breathed a sigh of relief, thanking heaven for his friend's naivety.  
"It would take a knife or something like that but, look ..." He scratched the rubber with his fingers until it came off and threw it in the sink, "It came off anyway!"  
"You have magic fingers!" Cam joked and Noel laughed.  
"Fuck, my knees hurt."  
"You really are a grandpa, Noel."  
"Help me get up, so ungrateful!"  
Cam took his hands and helped him to his feet, laughing like two children. After searching for him for a long time among the various embossed dark metal and natural oak cabinets in the large bathroom, they finally found a hairdryer and the redhead dried the wet patch from his pants. They quickly tidied up the room and got ready to leave.  
"Noel..." He called as the other opened the door and he turned.  
"What's up?"  
"I..." He swallowed hard a couple of times, "Lately, I feel... I feel..."  
"What?"  
"Well... I don't know..." He hesitated and tried differently, "You don't feel... anything?"  
"About what?"  
"Something different..." And after a pause that seemed endless he added, "Or strange."  
"Cam, what are you trying to tell me?" He asked confused and perhaps a little worried.  
They were staring into each other's eyes, wrapped in their own bubble of trust. Cam knew he could tell him anything... anything... and he would understand. But when Noel asked him directly, Cam realized that he himself had no idea what he was trying to tell him.  
"Nothing, forget it." Cameron gently pushed Noel to make room and exit the bathroom, but the blonde grabbed his arm and he turned to look at him.  
"Cam..." He squeezed his hand tighter and then let him go, "I-"  
"Hey guys!" A huge talking puppet appeared suddenly, cutting off whatever Noel was about to say in the bud.  
"I found this costume upstairs and I just had to wear it..." Emmy said, lifting the padded head and thus revealing her smiling face, "Don't ask me why."  
The mysterious mythological figure, half peluche, half Emmy, was holding Day-Z, Joan's massive English Bulldog, who didn't seem to be too happy at the time.

  
<https://i.ibb.co/TBd5YBk/Cap-4-foto-4.png>

"Yeah, sure..." Noel joked, "Who wouldn't want to wear a huge bear costume in August?"  
"It's a beaver!" She pointed at the puppet's face in a disheveled way, tossing the dog a little in her arms, "See the big tooth?"  
They nodded in amusement and apologized for the unforgivable mistake.  
"The bathroom is free?"  
Cam and Noel parted to clear the passage for the girl who passed in the middle, then, turned towards them and nodded her head towards Day-Z.  
"Joan asked me to take him for a walk... do you guys want to do it?"  
"Sure, no problem." Before even finishing the sentence, Cam already had the big dog in his arms.  
"Thank you. Now if you don't mind… ” Emmy smiled and walked into the bathroom, waving to her friends before closing the door behind her. The two unfortunates looked at each other and burst out laughing, but the moment was interrupted by Noel's cell phone which began to ring.  
"I have to answer." He said apologetically, pointing to an unspecified spot in the corridor to indicate that he was going away in search of a quiet place to talk, "It won't take long."  
"Don't worry, take your time." He tried his best not to sound bitter, but in truth, the certainty that his girlfriend was calling him somehow troubled him.  
It wasn't jealousy or anything like that... not at all... but Cam believed that the time in Chicago was his time with Noel. It was only a few days and he wanted to keep it to himself at all times.  
"We... we can manage on our own." They exchanged an unconvincing smile that left both of their lips as Noel turned away.  
"Come on, Day-Z, let's see if uncle Jeremy wants to join us."


	5. Chapter 5

  
<https://i.ibb.co/Sm8qfRn/Love-isn-t-enough-2012.jpg>

Someone told him they saw Jeremy out on the porch to smoke, so Cam and Day-Z, armed with leashes and plastic bags, went out to join him. The veranda was illuminated only by the light from the street lamps and a few open windows here and there let some air circulate, but given the sultry heat of August it still was like being closed in a greenhouse.  
Taking a first look Cam saw no one, but he heard a creak in the distance and decided to approach him blindly, but when he was close enough he realized he had made a mistake. Jeremy and Emma were clinging to an old garden swing, so busy making out that they didn't notice them until Day-Z, perhaps mistaking them for two cats in heat, started barking at him.  
"Fuck, Cam!" Jeremy jumped in fright and Emma nearly fell to the ground, "I was going to have a heart attack!"  
"Sorry guys..." He said embarrassed, as he tried to silence the dog, "I had no idea that..."  
"Were you looking for us?" Emma smiled and hugged her boyfriend, now aware of being caught, "Do you need something?"  
"No, we... we were just leaving, right Day-Z?" He pulled hard on the leash and dragged the hound who kept protesting, "Come On, Big Boy, walk!"  
Jeremy gave Day-Z the middle finger as Cam dragged him out with difficulty.  
"Hey, guys..." He turned to look at them before exiting the glass door, "I'm happy for you."  
He really was.  
Jeremy was like an older brother to him and, even if they didn't spend much time together lately, he always remained a point of reference for him. That was why he had been looking for him, not for company on the walk with Day-Z, but because he had missed him and also because he wanted to talk to him about Noel and all the strange things that were happening to him. Actually, at times Cam had the impression that Jeremy didn't like Noel too much, it was just a feeling of course, but when the redhead got carried away by his self-centeredness, he became convinced that his fake brother was just a little bit jealous of his strong relationship with Noel, so similar to what he had only with him in the past.  
He sure would know what to do, would help him as he always did. But now Jeremy had Emma, Noel had Layla and Cam... Cam was feeling lonely.

  
Upon returning from the walk, Day-Z was definitely in a better mood, so much so that when he saw Noel sitting on the porch steps he walked up to him happily hopping. Cam wanted to do the same, but just smiled at him.  
"Hey!" The blond greeted them from afar, "I've been waiting for you."  
"Really?" He said surprised when they reached him and Noel nodded awkwardly, trying to dodge Day-Z's kisses, who soon resigned himself and lay down between his feet.  
"Have you been here long?"  
Noel raised his hand that was holding a spent cigarette up to the filter, took one last drag and threw it away. He took the pack from his pocket, lit another, and handed it to Cam.  
"I'm sorry I dumped you."  
"You do not have to apologise." He inhaled a large amount of smoke and held it in his lungs, then let it come out of his nose and created a white cloud to hide the expression of someone who didn't believe in what he was saying, “We don't have to spend every moment together." He passed the cigarette to Noel and snorted a bitter laugh, "We're not engaged."  
The blond instead laughed with conviction, as if that were the most ridiculous thing he had ever heard. He gave a playful shove to Cam who turned to look at him.  
"Do you really think engaged people spend all their time together?" He looked down at Day-Z and patted his head, "They'd end up hating each other if they did."  
A few minutes passed in which the two boys smoked their cigarettes in silence, exchanging only a few fleeting glances.  
"So..." Noel began again suddenly, "What was it?"  
"What was it... what?"  
"The title of the movie... the one you should have mimicked."  
"’50 first dates’." He said after snorting a laugh, "You know... the one with Drew Berrymore and Adam Sandler."  
"Yeah, I know it. It’s a good movie. You worked with Adam, right?"  
"Yes, when I was a child."  
"He's cool, right?"  
"Yes, Adam is great."  
Silence fell again, Noel took the last drag and then threw out the second cigarette as well, "Nothing beats a first kiss." He whispered, absently puffing smoke into the air.  
Cam recognized the line from the film and, inevitably, a single thought flashed through his head, but before he knew it, his mouth was already gone, "How was it..." And he couldn't stop it, "Your first kiss with Layla?"  
For Noel that unexpected question was like a cold shower, he laughed nervously to hide his embarrassment and tried to get away with little.  
"It's a long story." (1)  
"We have time."  
"It was..." He scratched his nose with his index finger as he seemed to return his mind to that moment, raised his eyebrows and nodded his head, finally decided that the more appropriate word was: "Weird." (1)  
"Which one isn't?" Cam joked, feeling a little uncomfortable, but managed to get a laugh out of him.  
"And what about... hmm... Linda?"  
"Linda?" Cam asked confusedly, "You mean Liana?"  
"Yes."  
"What's Liana got to do with it?"  
"Have you kissed her already?"  
"What?" He rang in shock, shaking his head vigorously from side to side, “No, absolutely not! Liana is just a friend."  
"Sure." He smiled, winking.  
“I'm serious, Noel. She is one of my closest friends!"  
"Okay, okay, I get it." He raised his hands in the air in surrender and chuckled at the boy's pout, then they were silent for a while.  
"But, you know... abstinence is starting to go to my head, so maybe I should find a girlfriend." Cam said with a forced smile, "Or maybe the problem is something else..."  
Noel looked at him confused, he noticed the boy's effort to hide the worry behind that warm smile that would not have convinced anyone.  
"Does it have something to do with what you were trying to tell me earlier in the bathroom?"  
"I think so..." He looked down and shrugged, "Or maybe not, I don't know."  
"I know how you feel." Noel said with a sympathetic and extremely sweet voice receiving in response a silent but eloquent 'bitch please!' look.  
"I don't think you know, Noel."  
"Do you think I've never felt confused about what I really wanted?" He sighed, undecided whether to continue or not, "Cam, listen..." He slid his butt on the step until there was no more space between them, "I am the last person to be able to give advice on this, but one thing I can tell you... "He put a hand on his knee and lightly stroked it with his index finger, "Don't do something just because you think you have to do it or because others expect you to do it. Do what you feel when you feel ready to do it." He paused for a minute longer, seeming to reflect even more on his next words, “Have the courage to make your choices, to do what makes you happy, otherwise sooner or later you regret it. And I assure you it's hard to live with regrets."  
"Do you speak from experience?" He asked seriously, worried by those words. Noel snorted a disconsolate laugh and whispered, "Something like that."  
"Noel, I-" Cam tried again, but stopped when he heard the door open behind them, they turned and found Emmy standing in the doorway looking at them. She had on a pair of huge green glasses, a winter hat that said 'roast beef' and an amused smirk for her new disguise.  
"Hey guys!" She said, interrupting them for the second time that night, “We're ready to see the movie. Come inside?"  
Noel and Cam nodded and Emmy going away added, "Joan and I made almond butter."  
At those words Day-Z opened his eyes wide and in a flash he got up on short and wobbly legs, jumped ungracefully between the two boys sitting on the step above him and made space between them to be able to pass, then scurrying quickly into the house followed by all the others.

  
<https://i.ibb.co/HxYhr9c/Cap-5-foto-1.png>

  
After a long day of work on the streets of Chicago and a hearty dinner of deep-dish pizza, the cast returned to the hotel. Noel and Cam had rooms on the same corridor and when the elevator doors opened they were exactly halfway between them.  
"My place or yours?" He tried Cam with a last glimmer of hope in his eyes, deciding to himself that this would be the last time he would ask him to stay.  
"No, man, I can't." He said spontaneously, like a chant repeated too many times now, "I have to... you know."  
"Layla. Sure. I know." He pursed his lips in a bitter smile and greeted him with a pat on the shoulder, “See you tomorrow. Good night."  
Cam walked down the hall to his room while Noel stood looking at him. Although they spent a lot of time together when they were in Chicago, it was also true that the days available to them were very few.  
He had all his life to be with his girlfriend, now he wanted his friend's company.  
"That's all?" He yelled at him from afar, "Are you just gonna let me go like this?"  
"What?" Cam swiped the card into the magnetic lock on the door and turned to look a little puzzled.  
"Damn, Cam, what's wrong with you? You didn't insist even a little on convincing me to stay."  
"What the fuck are you talking about?"  
"You didn't invite me to a sleepover..." He teased him as he walked up to him, "You didn't ask me to humiliate you at video games..."  
"You're such an idiot, Noel!" He said feigning offense when the blond joined him at the door.  
"What is it, bruh, you don't love me anymore?"  
Cam missed the ground under his feet for a moment, didn't have time to put together two words that Noel pushed him aside and entered the room.  
"Am I not your buddy anymore?" He reached the bed and dove into it with his arms and legs spread out, the tight jeans and tight shirt making him look like a sexy starfish attached to a rock. He laughed when he saw Cam still in the doorway watching him dazed in silence.  
"What's up?"  
"Didn't you have a phone call to make?"  
"It can wait, it's not that late." He climbed up the bed and settled on the left side, arms behind his head and ankles crossed, "We can smoke a cigarette."  
"Do you want something from the minibar?" Cam smiled and closed the door.  
"C'mere." Noel shook his head and patted the mattress with his hand.  
"I adoowwwre this hotel." He yawned as the redhead sat down by his feet and turned to look at him, then settled back and closed his eyes, "These beds are great."  
"Hey!" Cam called him, shaking his leg, "Don't fall asleep here."  
Noel didn't answer, so the redhead crawled onto the bed next to him, turned to his right side and looked at him for a while. His perfect profile, his lips parted and his breathing calm and regular.  
"Noel..." He whispered softly and, although he got no answer, he knew for sure that the man was still awake, "You're not my buddy..."  
Noel raised an eyebrow and Cam laughed.  
"Jeremy is."  
"Bullshit." He said seriously, still keeping his eyes closed, then turned to look at Cam and they both burst out laughing. They were close, their noses inches apart, Cam could see every detail of his handsome smiling face. The fair skin and the blond frame of hair, eyebrows and barely hinted beard made him almost too bright to look at. Blue eyes like the spring sky and the sweetest smile in the world. He noticed for the first time the three small freckles on the left side of his mouth that stood out among the others, one on the upper lip and two immediately below the lower one, so cute that he could no longer look away. Noel noticed it and pursed his lips in embarrassment, maybe even blushed a little, but before Cam could see him, he jumped out of bed and walked to the open window. The redhead watched him light a cigarette and blow out the smoke, then rolled over to the side of the bed where Noel had been and resting his head on the pillow smelled his scent of heady cocktails and cigars (2).  
"Damn, how much I ate!" Noel complained. To avoid triggering the smoke detectors, he held both arms out the window up to the elbow, bent slightly forward with his butt in plain sight, his back was completely to Cam, but the redhead couldn't fault it.  
"Tell me about it. I hope to be able to race tomorrow."  
"Are you and Jeremy going to do the chase scene with the cops for the laser theft?"  
"Yep."  
"You will have the military uniform, right?"  
"Yep."  
"It looks really good on you, you know?" He said without even turning, "It makes you look older." He scratched his eyebrow with his thumb as a large cloud of smoke came down from his nostrils, "Sometimes I forget you're still a kid."  
“Fuck you, Noel. I'm not a kid!" Cam protested, sinking his face into the pillow, which made him even less credible in the eyes of the older one who, finding that image so tender when he turned to look at him, knew he was right. Cam was getting taller every year, physically sturdy and confident, looking older than he was, looking mature, an experienced man, but to look at him well, you realized he was still a teenager just wanting to look adult. Just like Noel had been before him, fucked up by the same urge to grow that had led him to make hasty choices.  
"Yes you are!" He hid his face in his folded arms on the ledge by the window and whispered, "You're a fucking kid."  
He stood motionless for a few minutes and Cam stopped rebelling, stopped to look at him confused, not understanding why he was so suddenly darkened. When Noel looked back at the Chicago skyline, the redhead took courage and spoke.  
"Are you okay?"  
Noel nodded, raised the cigarette to his mouth and inhaled until he consumed half of it with a single drag.  
"You've been smoking too much lately."  
“I know, it's just… I think I'm a little stressed out. You know, work, cohabitation..." He immediately pointed out, "I mean, Layla is fantastic, cohabitation is fantastic... but it's also complicated."  
Silence.  
"Sometimes I think I should have waited, I mean, I'm not talking about now, I'm 28 now and I've been with Layla for a long time... I meant… I should have taken things calmly in the beginning. I was so young... I should have been on my own for a while. Do you understand what I mean?"  
Silence.  
«Well, you know it better than me... you are not even twenty and you already live alone. You invite friends, girls... do what you want, right?"  
Silence.  
"Cam, are you listening to me?" He turned to look at him and the redhead's head snapped like a spring from the pillow.  
"Yes, of course... I listen to you... girls, yeah, you're right."  
"Yeah... girls." He repeated dramatically, "I immediately settled down... I didn't date any other girl..." He sighed, biting his lower lip, "I didn't date anyone else." He contemplated for a moment not going further, but he had just scratched the surface and already felt a little lighter, so he continued, "Maybe my life would be different now... maybe I would have made different choices... He turned back to Cam, but this time he found him asleep.  
"I would have chosen someone different." He whispered, smiling sadly to himself, watching him sleep. He took a last drag on the wind-worn cigarette, threw it out the window, and walked over, crouching by the bed where Cam lay curled up on his side, hands clinging to the pillow and mouth open.  
They were close, their noses inches apart, Noel could see every detail of her beautiful sleeping face. The very pale skin strewn with freckles like a starry sky, the fiery hair and the big downward eyes of that indefinite shade that ranged from emerald green to perfection made color.  
A small droplet of sweat slipped from the protruding temple between the freckles all along the forehead and Noel gently caught it with his thumb, but then, it continued to flow down the boy's face. He moved from the eyebrow to the eye, from the cheekbone to the cheek, up to caressing his lips which, in his sleep, opened slightly in that usual crooked smile that made Noel smile in turn. Immersed in that feeling of total tranquility, Noel did not wonder if that gesture was a bit unusual on his part or not, he simply decided not to think about it at all.  
He gently took off his shoes and placed them at the foot of the bed, then left without waking him.

  
<https://i.ibb.co/kyBRhyF/Cap-5-foto-2.png>

~~~*~~~

When August gave way to a cooler September, shooting for the second half of the season resumed in W.B. Studios. On the 18th they started working on 'Where There's a Will' and, given Mickey's absence in the eighth episode, Noel was off the set for the whole week. He didn't get to see Cam even for an evening after work because he was very busy between the promotion of 'The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2' and various social events.  
That Saturday, for example, he and Layla had been to the pre-Emmy party History Channel at the luxurious 'Sho House' restaurant in West Hollywood, California.  
When they got home they were almost completely drunk, she took off her dizzying heels and left them near the door as soon as she crossed the threshold, Noel saw her sway to the living room where she prepared a last martini. He joined her and, after dropping a dead weight on the chair, poured himself a drink.  
"There's no better way to end this night." Noel grinned, hinting a toast.  
"Actually..." Layla took a small sip and put the glass down on the cocktail cart, "There would be a better way."  
She swayed up to him, whiskey mingled with gin in their mouths as she bent down to kiss him. She grabbed him by the tie and yanked him all the way down the hall to the bedroom, but Noel didn't give up on his last dose of alcohol and took the glass with him and placed it blindly somewhere along the way only after he emptied it.  
Both were very elegant, him in his total gray suit and her wrapped in her tight white and yellow dress. It wasn't easy to get rid of it, but then everything went on naturally and they ended up having sex all night, as they had perhaps not done for too long. It was lewd and funny, Noel didn't want it to end as soon as he used to, certainly prolonged abstinence and alcohol had helped. Despite the unusual enthusiasm, however, they did not forget to use condoms to preserve their strict agreement not to have children.  
Layla fell asleep exhausted as soon as she put her head on the pillow, she had only one earring and all the makeup smudged on her face, her unkempt hair fell on her sweaty naked breasts. Noel watched her for a while and then he saw it ... a droplet of sweat on her forehead, he watched it slide slowly down until it soaked the pillow.

  
(1) The long story is told in the "[Godiva's](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29986965/chapters/73826958)" prequel, which I recommend reading after chapter 7 to avoid some minor spoilers.  
(2) Fragrance used by Noel:  
Eau de toilette REPLICA, Maison Margiela, Paris.  
Reproduction of familiar scents and moments of varying locations and periods.  
Originally: Jazz Club  
Provenance and Period: Brooklyn, 2013  
Fragrance Description: Heady cocktails and cigars  
Style Description: Male fragrance


	6. Chapter 6

  
<https://i.ibb.co/Sm8qfRn/Love-isn-t-enough-2012.jpg>

"I swear, I've never worked so hard to get someone to do something..."  
"Yeah, Jeremy... hates clothes that are too formal."  
"It was just a stupid tie and it fit him perfectly."  
Cam and Emma were in the minivan that had accompanied them to the set, sitting in the front seats, chatting while waiting to shoot the scene where Ian and Mandy would set up the hall for the big event. In fact, in that third week of October, 3x11 shooting was underway, the damn episode of Mickey's wedding.  
Cam took another bite of his peanut butter and jelly sandwich (PBJ) and let himself be photographed by his friend, sure to end up on Instagram as usual.

  
<https://i.ibb.co/QjLdP9d/Cap-6-foto-0.png>

"How did it start between you?" Cam asked, seeing the light shine in the girl's eyes, like every time she talked about Jeremy.  
"How it starts with everyone, I think." She replied, after a moment of uncertainty, “We became friends first, we spent a lot of time together off the set. Slowly our friendship has turned into something else... not so slowly, actually." She laughed a little embarrassedly, "Playing such a ‘passionate couple’ from day one..." Mimicked the quotes with her fingers and smiled, "Maybe this speeded things up. But it was inevitable. There was always a strong attraction between us that grew quickly, until it exploded and we haven't been able to stop since then."  
Emma looked away and stroked her hair in a ponytail, "It was uncontrollable and overwhelming." She said with a sweet dreamy smile, then turned back to Cam, "Anyway, it's very common for two actors to fall in love on set."  
"How did you know it was something real? That you weren't just being swayed by the character and..." He broke off and gritted his teeth, when he spoke again his voice sounded shaky, "That Jeremy felt the same about you too?"  
"I already told you."  
Cam's lips tightened tightly and his brows frowned in a confused expression.  
"That look." Emma smiled sweetly, walked a few inches from his face and put her blue eyes on his, "You know when you see it."  
Emma returned with her back to the seat and made herself more comfortable although more disheveled, she seemed to think about something, "It's like you and Noel."  
"W-what?" Cam jumped.  
“I'm talking about that chemistry that's so strong between you guys. I mean, yeah, your situation is a little different. Obviously there is no chance for you to establish a romantic relationship, or the chance that physical and sexual attraction will push you beyond friendship, right?" Emma asked, but it wasn't a real question. Cam, however, still fell prey to a slight panic.  
"Of course." He replied, then in doubt retracted, "I mean, no." He moved his head confusedly between 'yes' and 'no', hoping only to be able to agree with her in some way, "I mean... it's as you say. Obviously." He finally said with a convinced expression.  
"Yeah, but it clearly feels like you're connected in a deeper way, far beyond acting."  
"You can't fake that, right?" Cam muttered, quoting a line from Ian, and his initially uncertain smile widened when he saw Emma nod ‘no’.  
"He's my manager." Cam said, when the buzz of his cell phone spoiled the moment, "Sorry, I have to answer." He smiled and got out of the minivan for a few minutes to talk.

~~~*~~~

  
<https://i.ibb.co/2kwyRGx/Cap-6-foto-1.jpg>

Cam and Noel were out of Warner Bros Studios having a chat. They had just finished filming Ian and Mickey's encounter/clash before Milkovichs wedding and everyone was on a break. Noel attracted Cam's attention by raising a hand towards him who immediately returned the gesture by high-five.  
"Okay. Scratch that off the list. Made out with a dude!" The brunette said and Cam looked at him a little amazed.  
"I didn't know making out with a dude was on your list!" He hit him with a playful elbow and Noel snorted an embarrassed laugh, but said nothing more.  
"You're done for today, aren't you?"  
"Yeah, I can't wait to take off this tux, I feel like I'm suffocating!"  
"I have to go back inside, I'm going to enjoy the reception." He sighed disconsolately, "Too bad there's no real vodka in there, I really need it."  
"Hey, what's going on?" Noel asked, alarmed by the really dejected look on his friend's face.  
"Nothing, forget it." He was bothered by the inability to control his emotions lately.  
"Cam!"  
“It's just… I told you. It's, like, a weird time, right now." He hesitated in embarrassment, "Last night, I ate a whole jar of peanut butter for dinner."  
Although Noel was still worried, he broke into a typical humming laugh of his own, then giggling again he exclaimed, "Fuck it, let's do it!"  
"Do what?"  
"Let's get drunk! Let's go have some fun tonight." He said, perhaps too enthusiastically and continued before the other could reply, “But first, let's go eat something other than a jar of peanut butter. Want to?"  
Noel gave him an encouraging smile but did not seem to reach Cam who, politely and unexpectedly, declined the invitation.

~~~*~~~

It was close to the end of the shoot that afternoon. Noel, Cam and Emma were on break before completing their final scene of the season all three together.  
Back from the bathroom, the dark-haired man reached behind the other two engaged in chat and found himself involuntarily eavesdropping.  
"And then I play drums and guitar, do snowboarding and extreme martial arts."  
"Wow, Cam, you are amazing!"  
"Yeah, incredible is the only word I would use." The redhead joked, even though he really thought so.  
"This is what I have to deal with all time." Noel grumbled, feigning annoyance, revealing his presence, "Bruh, you shouldn't brag that much."  
"What is it, Noel, are you envious?" Emma teased him.  
“Well, Noel isn't as incredible as I am…” Cam defended him, in his own way, “But he has his own list of talents too. He plays the piano, he played in the theater and... did you know he's a circus performer?"  
"Really?" She rolled her eyes at Noel, incredulous.  
"Nothing like that." He laughed embarrassed, "I'm just trained in circus stilt walking."  
"And then judo and dance..." Cam continued, "But I'm better at dancing than him."  
"Are you sure, Monaghan?"  
"Absolutely, Fisher." He said boldly, "You will know how to walk on stilts, but I beat you on your feet."  
"There's only one way to know..." Emma picked up the phone and her intentions were clear to everyone. The two boys prepared to take on the dance challenge to an eventful pop song, but Emma played slow, romantic music, laughing mischievously at Cam's sarcastic expression for that joke. Unexpectedly, Noel stepped forward and invited him to dance by holding out his hand with a flourish.  
"May I have this dance?" He asked in the most gallant way possible, looking him in the eye and smiling at him.  
Cam hesitated, surprised, then nodded and resigned himself to accepting, because he had no other choice, there was no way to turn down that invitation. He grabbed the tattooed hand and could swear he felt Noel lightly stroke his back with his thumb. The brunette roughly wrapped his arm around Cam’s waist and pulled the boy towards him until their bodies adhered completely, Cam's breath caught in his throat, but he tried to hide his nervousness by smiling. Noel gently squeezed the redheads hand, which he had been holding in his all along, and lifted them together to the height of the tallest shoulder between the two, definitely Cameron's. He freed him from the grip around his waist, for only a moment, to take his other hand and place it on his right shoulder, then he went back to wrap his arm around Cams waist, clinging his fingers to his left side and it was then, that they finally found themselves in the classic slow dance position. Cam wanted to back off a bit, but Noel squeezed him tightly and began to dance, dragging him behind, stiff as a broomstick.  
They weren't in harmony and were constantly bumping into each other, more than a dance, theirs felt like an embarrassing tug-of-war fight.  
"Let me lead, okay?" Noel laughed and held Cam close, tight in his arms.  
"Okay." Cam repeated, barely audible, his voice slightly lit from the friction between their bodies in all that twirling. A rush of endorphins that made him light and unstable on his feet. Despite everything, he did his best to follow him, shuffling his feet to avoid stepping on Noels, who led him with his whole body, head held high, shoulders and elbows steady. The older one had been talking to him the whole time but he was too excited to listen.  
The movements became synchronized and fluid in a very short time, their usual chemistry also began to manifest in the dance too. It just seemed that whatever they did together, they always succeeded perfectly.  
Suddenly, Cam again felt Noel's thumb running up and down his side, like a caress from over his shirt and in less than a second unstoppable goosebumps that covered his entire body. He closed his eyes and surrendered to that feeling, unable to think of anything else, but at the best part the music ended and the spell broke.  
Noel stepped back and, feeling strangely elated, made a small bow of thanks. Cam snorted a laugh, breathing for the first time since it all started.  
"Bravo!" Emma shouted, cheering enthusiastically, "Beautiful boys!"  
The girl asked them for a photo in memory of that memorable moment and, although the last ten minutes had been very intense for Cam, he regained his bravado and this time he decided to take the initiative. Taking Noel by surprise, he grabbed his hand and pulled him towards him accompanying him in a pirouette that the brunette indulged in amusedly, and when his back pressed against his chest, the redhead blocked him in that position, squeezing him on his chest with the arm. Noel assumed the position of a proud prima ballerina and Emma immediately snapped the picture.  
"Is there anything you can't do?" Asked the girl distractedly, more interested in posting her beautiful photo on Instagram, while Cam mentally made a note to pop into her profile to leave her a ‘like’ and above all, save the photo.  
"I'm not good at singing." The redhead replied disconsolately, "But I do it anyway because I love it."  
Unfortunately for the rest of the crew who were forced to listen to them, not knowing exactly how it happened, Cameron and Emma ended up singing at the top of their voices a singular version of 'Twinkle twinkle little star', or as Noel called it, the 'orgasm song', confirming in the worst way their poor aptitude for singing. (1)

  
<https://i.ibb.co/RY7C8pw/Cap-6-foto-2.jpg>

  
<https://i.ibb.co/Cnnjff9/Cap-6-foto-3.jpg>

~~~*~~~

"Noel?!" Emma tried to get the attention of her friend who was staring into space as he ran his finger along the edge of his half-empty glass. Noel and Emma, along with Jeremy and his friend Addison Timlin, were sitting at the sofas in the private room of a small pub that Emma had chosen for the occasion.  
No one had brought up the subject, but everyone missed Cameron who, for the umpteenth time, had refused to join them for no apparent reason.  
"You know, as great as it is to sit here in silence with you drinking beer, small talk between friends only works when you use your mouth to talk."  
"Sorry, I was thinking."  
"At what?"  
"Cam."  
"Something wrong with him?"  
"I don't know..." He hesitated, shaking his head, "Do you see him weird lately?"  
"I don't think so." She said after thinking about it, "Today he seemed quite normal to me."  
"He's a weirdo!" Jeremy interjected, with a small smile but hinting at a hint of irritation, "You should know by now, since you two hang out a lot."  
"Yeah..." He sighed, letting the blond's jab slip over him, "But when we're together he behaves normally."  
"We had so much fun during the shoot this afternoon." Emma confirmed, after nodding to Noel's words.  
"For the rest of the time, though, he seems distant and often isolates himself."  
"Maybe you should respect his space." Jeremy said, in the same tone as just before that made him get a glare from his girlfriend. She hit him with her foot under the table, then turned back to Noel.  
"Did something happen?"  
"Not that I know of. He keeps telling me not to worry, that he's just going through a weird time... "He looked down sadly at his glass, "But he doesn't confide in me as much anymore."  
"If he says not to worry, then you shouldn't." After yet another murderous look from his girlfriend, Jeremy raised his hands in surrender, "I'm just saying if it doesn't feel right to force him to talk if he doesn't want to."  
"Did he say something to you?"  
"No."  
"Could you try to talk to him?" Emma asked with a softer expression and the blond's eyes rolled skyward. "Please!" She added, to persuade her boyfriend, completely ignoring his nice speech about 'don't force someone to talk'.  
"Sure." He muttered discontently, then he and Addison left the table to go order the second round of beers.  
"Don't listen to him..." As soon as they were alone Emma stroked his hand where the faded ink of the fake tattoos were still visible, "He's very protective of Cam, he really considers him like a brother."  
Noel nodded and she turned to look at the two friends laughing at the bar, continued talking despite a gradual shift of attention from what she was saying to what her blue eyes were seeing, "I think he's a little jealous. of the time you spend together."  
Noel took a sip and let the background chatter fill the silence between them for a few minutes, then called her softly.  
"Emma, are you okay?"  
"They always stick together." She replied expressionlessly, without looking away, "They worked on a stupid movie together when they were kids... and now they're always stuck." She explained angrily, without anyone having asked her, "I know this can just be like a friends thing and they are old friends, okay... but she's always with us!" She fell silent for a moment and then, as if her conscience had scolded her, retracted her words, "Okay, not always... but it seems like Addison can't tell when it's time to step aside."  
She turned to Noel and waved an inquisitive finger in front of his face, "You know, he doesn't want to admit, but I'm sure they've been together in the past." Then she immediately returned her eyes to Addison, who was laughing lightly, "Maybe now she wants to get him back..."  
Noel was about to take her hand in a reassuring gesture, but Emma suddenly turned her head like the little girl of 'The Exorcist', making him jump.  
"Am I paranoid in your opinion?"  
"Maybe you're just a little jealous too." Noel smiled and tried to reassure her by gently stroking her back.  
"I'd like to ask him to move to my house, but I'm afraid Addison would come and live with us." She snorted a bitter but still amused laugh and saw Noel do the same.  
"Don't worry, I'm not going to hit her with a car."  
They laughed at their Milkoviches black humor.  
Who could have done it better than the two of them?  
They toasted, clinking their glasses and drank their beers by the drop.  
When they arrived in the parking lot, Jeremy and Addison were together a few steps ahead, while Noel and Emma stood behind talking. He encouraged her to ask her boyfriend to move in while she recommended that he stay close to Cam and not let him walk away, whatever the reason.  
Emma asked Jeremy to take a picture of her with her screen brother and immediately posted it on Instagram.

  
<https://i.ibb.co/rH9fm06/Cap-6-foto-4.jpg>

~~~*~~~

Dude (6:39 pm): Hey bruh  
Dude (6:39 pm): Do you already have plans for this weekend?  
Bruh (6.57 pm): Why do you want to know?  
Bruh (6.57 pm): What happens this weekend?  
Dude (6.57 pm): I'm going to make you an offer you can't refuse  
Dude (6:57 pm): Come to my place, order Italian food and watch the entire Godfather trilogy  
Bruh (6.58): Don Noel, you know how much I love Italian food, the Godfather and invitations with perfectly fitting movie quotes. I appreciate the effort, but unfortunately I cannot accept.  
Dude (6:58 pm): Did you miss the part where I specified that the offer cannot be refused?  
Dude (6.58 pm): What are you up to?  
Bruh (6.58): Nothing ... it's just that this weekend I would like to rest a bit  
Dude (6:59 pm): I'll send you to sleep with the fish if you blow me off to rest!  
Bruh (6.59): Technically ... it's not "blow you off" if I haven't accepted the invitation first  
Dude (6:59 pm): Technically ... 🖕🏻  
Dude (6:59 pm): Come on Cam, we haven't had a night together in a long time  
Dude (6:59 pm): We can order whatever you want and see whatever trilogy you prefer  
Dude (7.00 pm): I leave you full decision-making power  
Dude (7.00pm): Whatever makes you get your ass up and come here  
Dude (7.01 pm): Don't make me invite myself to your house, you know my couch is more comfortable!  
Dude (7.05 pm): Cam?  
Dude (7.05 pm): 🙏🏻  
Bruh (7.06 pm): Okay

(1) The audio in question really exists, but I have not been able to upload it.  
Cameron and Emma sing "Twinkle twinkle little star" and in the finale we hear Noel say: "That's the orgasm song on shameless".  
You should be able to find it [HERE](https://www.instagram.com/p/CLuBU54gZ8d/)  
Ps. Follow [goodmorningmrgallavich](https://www.instagram.com/goodmorningmrgallavich/) on IG, it's amazing!


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